So it turns out that this is one of the largest whatever-it-is that most people have seen before. One of my GFs works at an ENT office and says she looks at scans all day long and has never seen this. But it explains the pain I've been having.
The ENT I saw did a needle aspiration from my neck (long, giant needle pulling liquid out) and got 50cc out. He could have done more, but I was hesitant. He put the needle in twice, and a third time was probably not in the cards. I won't lie, even with a local anesthesia, it hurt. A LOT.
The cells that were sent to the lab aren't back yet, but because it grew so fast, and appears to be "hot" it's very UNLIKELY that is cancerous. *phew*
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